Poised to Meet You!

Real mom post, here.  This is your only warning!

I remember when I was younger, in my twenties, and I thought it would be fun to be pregnant.  Ok, not fun in the sense of true enjoyment, all the time, but that the growing baby and the kicks and just being able to relax and not hold your stomach in would be really special and neat and ok, sort of fun.  I knew there could be morning sickness that turned to evening sickness and things like that but just figured that growing the baby would all be worth it and that it would be a really rewarding and generally positive experience.  

And then I got pregnant.  And I really can’t say that I had bad pregnancies.  Yes, some morning sickness, yes, some heartburn, yes, some vomiting, but not nearly as bad as what I know some go through.  And those other parts are *fun*.  The baby kicks and the not holding your stomach in and the excitement.  But then there are parts that aren’t so fun that either no one told you or you thought maybe just wouldn’t happen to you because you were in denial.  And then isn’t there also a sense of terror that you’re about to bring another life into the world and you may actually have no idea what you’re doing?  There was for me.  Still is for me, if we’re honest.  And we are, here.

But today, today, in my third pregnancy, I bought something that I have never bought before.  I bought some Poise pads.  For those of you that don’t know, Poise pads are meant to account for bladder incontinence.  They catch pee.  Y’all.  If you’ve been pregnant, you know about peeing your pants.  I remember finding that it happened much earlier than I thought it would with my first pregnancy, like around 13 or 14 weeks or something.  But still, through that one and the following pregnancy, a regular, good old mini pad seemed to be plenty to keep everyone covered.  Unless I happened to be vomiting.  Ugh, is this TMI?  We’re friends here, now, right?  We’ve all been there.  We all understand, right?  

This time, if you’ve been following along, you know my whole family has been plagued with some type of cold/flu/whatever the hell it is bug which has involved fevers, runny noses, coughing and vomiting from the kids and mostly just congestion, runny noses and coughing for me and my husband.  Like, for two weeks.  It started about this time two weeks ago with pink eye.  I forgot about the pink eye, ha!  But seriously.  So now the cough portion has hit me full force and I know that pregnancy is part of the reason I’ve been unable to completely shake it.  And pregnancy is also the reason that I pee a little almost every time I cough.  You see where we’re going, here?

I was tired of going through multiple pairs of pants and underwear every day.  I don’t even have that many pairs of pants I can wear now, to begin with.  My poor leggings.  Anyhow, last night, I was checking some email sitting on my bed and felt a coughing spell come on.  I could barely get out of bed and to the wood floor fast enough.  Thank God it’s a wood floor.  In the midst of not being able to stop coughing, I actually peed enough that there was a puddle on the floor.  A PUDDLE ON THE FLOOR.  I AM A GROWN WOMAN AND I PEED ON MY OWN FLOOR ENOUGH TO MAKE A PUDDLE!  And then I cried.  And then today, I went out and bought some Poise pads, because, well, that’s what I felt like I needed to do, today.    

We will get through this.  And I’m certain that this will even be funny one day.  Probably not tomorrow or next week, but eventually.  And you can totally laugh.  Today, by all means.  I hope at least someone can laugh from this.  Motherhood is messy.  It’s exhausting and maddening and unexplainable, at times.  But it’s real and amazing and so, so special.  So, we carry on.  We laugh, we cry, we pee our pants and we get through it.  One messy day at a time.  Here’s hoping your mess is not peeing in your own pants, today!

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